Eight Great Dating Tips for Gay Men[Relationship Guy]
Make Eye Contact
So many men today forget that conversation isn’t just about words. Men put a high value on communication that goes beyond words, and if you focus on impressing, talking and showing yourself in the best light, you may not be focusing on him. Eye contact assures him that he has your undivided attention – something every man wants on a date. It reassures him that the night is about him and him alone.
Remember to Ask Questions and Listen to His Answers
Yes, you want him to get to know you. You’ll have plenty of opportunity to let him get to know you if you get to know him on those first few dates. You should certainly answer his questions and give input to the conversation, but make sure you ask him about what he likes and what he’s interested in. Don’t forget to get his opinion rather than just giving yours – and if you disagree on a particular subject that’s fine. Debating an interesting topic in a relaxed manner will show you’re intelligent and that you respect his opinion. For Pete’s sake, don’t insist on changing his mind – respect his independence.
This sounds so simplistic, but I’m astounded by the number of men who try show off how successful and important they are by inflating their job titles, salary, etc. early on in a relationship. Do you really want to get caught in this type of charade weeks or even months down the line? If he’s really the one for you, he’ll respect what you do and who you are. Far better to find out now than later. Especially if you really have it for the guy later, and he dumps you for being deceitful. If you remember any dating tips for men, this is the absolute most important.
Grand Gestures on the First Date?
Save the flowers and grand gestures for after the first few dates. This is one of those dating tips for men that may come as a shock to a lot of you, but flowers on the very first date isn’t nearly as impressive as flowers or some other gift a few dates down the line. On the first date, a man will assume you bring flowers to every first date, so it’s a relatively empty gesture. Gallant, but not triggered by your feelings for him. On your third or fourth date, he’ll be wowed by a small gift or bouquet. Why? Because you’ve taken the time and thought to bring him something after you’ve already known he’ll go out with you. It means the gesture is heart-felt – it’s all about the way he makes you feel.
Keep it Casual
Another dating tip for a single man that’s often overlooked is to keep it casual. You don’t have to make the first date the most impressive and romantic in the world. After all, it’s difficult to go up if you start at the top – what will you do for an encore on an anniversary or special occasion?
Instead, go out for coffee or drinks on the first date. If you definitely want it to be dinner, suggest someplace nice but casual, not the Ritz. You’ll both be more comfortable when you aren’t worrying about which fork to use or how to address the wine steward. Choose a place that’s comfortable and not too loud so that you can linger and talk as long as you’d like.
Should You Talk about Work?
Avoid talking about work too much. Always remember this dating tip for men: Naturally a man wants to know what you do, and you should give him a brief sketch. But until you know a man really well, don’t give a long dissertation on the last deal you landed. You’ll either sound like you’re bragging or he’ll think you’re obsessed with your job. Neither image is appealing.
Show Up on Time
Don’t ever, ever keep a man waiting on you – it doesn’t build anticipation. It makes you appear inconsiderate and self-centered. If something happens and you can’t avoid running late, be sure to call ahead and apologize and let him know so that he isn’t sitting at home stewing.
Call When You Say You Will
(Here’s an online dating tip for men: The same applies to logging on – if you have plans to “meet” by Instant Message – be there.) No man ever wants to feel like he was humored and then brushed off. If you say you will call next week, call next week. Not the week after, or the next month. When you do that, it screams, “I was keeping you on the back burner just in case nothing better came along.”
If you aren’t interested in another date, don’t promise anything. Simply say, “I had a nice time. Good night.” Promising something you have no intention of following through on is guaranteed to make your name Mud.